The Beginning of the End of the Beginning
Cobblestoned conversation
meaningless meandering
the perception of perfection
haunts your heaven
The translucence of truth
piercing the prizm,
boring through your brooding
reinforces reality
Silence through sound
the modality of moods
the ineluctable intruder
negates the night
Words withheld
tears trace
love lost
opulent ocean
meaningless meandering
the perception of perfection
haunts your heaven
The translucence of truth
piercing the prizm,
boring through your brooding
reinforces reality
Silence through sound
the modality of moods
the ineluctable intruder
negates the night
Words withheld
tears trace
love lost
opulent ocean
6 Comments:
Very nice alliteration through the poem. Very subtle after the first two lines. Well done!
neat words that buzz. i like the way the aliteration doen't take your mind away from the totallity of the poem but kind of flows within it.
although I liked the sound of the poem I've to say the content was a little too dense for me...could not get what you were trying to say with this...but I really liked 'cobblestoned conversation'...a very original image!
the last verse resonated with me. almost stacatto in feel but with such lovely, flowing images.
I also enjoyed the fluidity of the gentle alliteration. I liked the last verse alot, but it seems to be in a different form than the rest of your piece. Is this to reinforce the theme of the poem? (a type fo infinite circle or did I miss something? Forgive me, I'm reading after a late night- I do so enjoy your work and am honored to reciprocate links with you!) Bear with me and feel free to email me if you wish to help me understand, but please indicate something distinctive other than your "face" so I'll know it's not spam. Thx! gelicious666@gmail.com
SivermOON (aka GEL)
Http://SIlkenThreads18.blog.com
.:a:. - Thank you! Just experimenting...
cocaine jesus - Thanks! I'm glad the meaning wasn't lost through my tinkering.
anil - Thanks for the comment. I was trying to create something universal through a specific moment. Of course, anyone can take away anything they like...
transience - Thank you! I guess the last few lines are something all of us feel at one time or another.
GEL - I, too, am honored for the reciprocation. I don't think you're necessarily missing anything. Feel free to take anything or nothing from it...
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